Last-But-Not-Least Lola and a Knot the Size of Texas Read online

  Me and Jack sit near the black olives. Jack wears a red tie that matches Dad’s red tie. And Grandma’s eyes get all wet and she takes a picture of them. Dad gives her a hug because sometimes your mom gets sad and the only thing that makes her feel better is a hug.

  Grampy and Granny Coogan and Grandma are all around the same amount of oldness. They have lots of catching up to do since they never celebrate Thanksgiving together.

  I wait and wait and wait for a moment to bust in and tell them my grown-up–kid idea. But they never take a breath. So I just barge in and tell them my idea.

  “Lola, that’s a wonderful suggestion,” Mom and Dad say. Dad grabs his jacket and heads out the door. “Be right back!”

  While Dad is gone, we head into the kitchen and start bringing bowls and plates to the table. The food smells buttery and spicy and yummy. Last but not least, I carry in Mom’s basket of rolls.

  The table is loaded down with food. I take a seat between my two grandmas, Zuckerman and Coogan.

  Just then, Dad comes in with Mrs. McCracken. She’s carrying a pie plate. Mrs. McCracken’s eyes are smiling and so are her lips.

  “Thank you for inviting me,” Mrs. McCracken says. She holds out her pie plate.

  “Oh, Mrs. McCracken, you didn’t have to bring anything!” Mom says.

  “I was already baking,” Mrs. McCracken says. “Pumpkin pie.”

  Jack and I look at each other. Pumpkin pie again!

  “How lovely!” Mom says.

  Mrs. McCracken comes in and joins the old people at the Thanksgiving table. They chat about the good old days. Dad helps Mom, Jack, and me carry the rest of the stuff to the table.

  Finally, it’s time for all of us to sit down.

  I send Jack a message. I am SO a grown-up kid. Even if I have a secret hair knot. And a pile of dogs to watch.

  Everyone eats turkey, and stuffing, and mashed potatoes, and salad and broccoli with a cheese sauce. Everyone eats cranberry sauce that is shaped just like a can. I made it myself. Finally it’s time for dessert.

  Pumpkin Pie.

  Pumpkin Pie.

  Pumpkin Pie!

  The pies are on the counter. Everyone lines up, and everyone takes three slices of pie. Everyone goes back to the table. Everyone doesn’t look at anyone.

  First I take a bite of Granny Coogan’s pumpkin pie. Mmmm, it’s good.

  “Well, Lola,” Granny Coogan says. “How is it?”

  “It’s yummy!” I say.

  Next, I take a bite of Grandma’s pumpkin pie. Eww. It tastes just like I remember. Like licking a bad ol’ candle. And I should know cause I did that once.

  “Lola, darling?” Grandma asks. “How was mine?”

  “Delicious,” I lie.

  “And whose is the best?” Both grandmothers ask me that at the exact same time.

  Ooh, my tummy hurts. So does my head. Lying is bad. So is getting caught. And boy, oh, boy, I am caught.

  My mouth opens just like the salmon on ice at Fred’s Fresh Fish Market. I have to tell the truth.

  “Hold on there!” Mrs. McCracken says. “You have to try mine, too!”

  I take a bite out of Mrs. McCracken’s pumpkin pie. It is the fluffiest, most delicious pumpkin pie. My eyes open wide ’cause I never knew pumpkin pie could taste so good. I say, “Mmm, mmm, that’s good pie!”

  “Yeah,” Jack grunts. Grunting is saying yum with a growl.

  “Mrs. McCracken,” I say in my Announcement voice. “Your pumpkin pie is the best. The best pumpkin pie contest is over!”

  “Yahoo!” Jack yells.

  Granny Coogan and Grandma get all pink in the face. They look at each other and burst out laughing.

  Granny Coogan takes a bite of Mrs. McCracken’s pie. Her eyes get very wide. “Y’all know what? This pumpkin pie beats mine to Kalamazoo and back!”

  Grandma takes a bite. She closes her eyes. “Heavenly,” she says. Mrs. McCracken grins really big.

  “Maybe you should try chocolate mousse pie next year,” Dad suggests to Grandma. “They probably sell that at Kling’s Bakery.”

  Jack and I look at each other. Grandma doesn’t bake her own pies. She buys them! No wonder they taste like licking a candle.

  “And y’all have never tried my world-famous blueberry pie! It’ll knock your socks off!” Granny Coogan says.

  Jack and I smile at each other. It’s going to be great to have a dessert that isn’t pumpkin pie!

  Aaarrrrrr-OOOOOO!

  Aaarrrrrr-OOOOOO!

  I drop my fork. “Barkley!”

  I run to the stairs. “You be quiet down there!” I yell. “Do you hear me?”

  Aaarrrrrr-OOOOOO!

  Aaarrrrrr-OOOOOO!

  “They didn’t hear you!” Jack says.

  I open the door a smidge.

  “Lola, be—” Mom says.

  “I said be quiet!” I say through the smidge. A wet snout pops through the opening. “Go back in there!”

  But Maizy pushes that door right open! She darts out, followed by Barkley, followed by Patches!

  15. NOT EXACTLY MY PLAN

  “PATCHES!” I YELL. I CHASE after Patches! Patches chases Barkley and Barkley chases Maizy. Maizy is like a white streak of melting vanilla ice cream going around and around the Thanksgiving table.

  Jack jumps up. “Patches!” he yells.

  “Well, snap my stays and call me granny!” Granny Coogan exclaims. “You’ve got a circus in here!”

  “Lola, grab him!” Dad shouts.

  “I’m trying!” I yell. I jump for Patches and I get his tail but it slides out of my fingers. Around and around the table he goes, chasing the other dogs. “It’s a good thing Dwight White didn’t come over!” I call to Mrs. McCracken.

  Barkley barks. RUFF! RUFF! RUFF! He knocks against the table and Mom’s piece of pumpkin pie slides off and right into her lap.

  Finally I get those dogs corralled and back in the basement. Mom heads upstairs to change her pants.

  I clear the table along with Jack and he just shakes his head at me. “Trouble, trouble, and more trouble,” is what he says.

  Afterward, we go back into the living room to drink tea and coffee, except me and Jack just lie on the floor like stuffed pillows.

  “I plumb forgot!” Granny Coogan reaches into a shopping bag. “I brought you each a Texas A & M baseball hat.”

  “Thank you, Granny Coogan,” Jack and I say. Jack slaps his right on his head.

  “Lola, why don’t you take off the ribbon and try it on?” Dad asks.

  “You don’t have to,” Granny Coogan says in a rush.

  “Oh, do go ahead,” Grandma says.

  Slowly I untie the ribbon. Easy, easy. BOING! My curly whirly hair springs out like a wild animal.

  “Lola’s got a hair knot the size of New York City,” Grandma says.

  “That’s a hair knot the size of Texas, I reckon,” Granny Coogan says.

  16. LOTS OF KNOTS

  MOM PILES A BUNCH OF Thanksgiving food into a genuine recyclable container for Mrs. McCracken. We get her all hugged up and then Dad walks her home.

  Even though I tell Grandma and Granny that I’m just going to get my hair chopped off into a crew cut like Grampy’s, they say I should give it another try.

  They must mean another cry.

  Because it’s going to hurt.

  Grandma and Granny Coogan and me climb the stairs. In the bathroom, I run myself a bath. I add some of my favorite bath bubbles.

  I wash my hair with Go Bananas Shampoo. I condition it with Berry Glad To Meet You conditioner.

  “I suggest you separate it into sections and brush it,” Grandma says. “That’s how I did it when I was a girl.”

  “Oh, I wouldn’t do that, Zelda!” Granny says. “She has my hair. Best way is to just run that brush right through.”

  “Well!” Grandma says. “I think her hair is a lot like mine!”

  Uh-oh. My knot is causing all kinds of problems.

  “I thi
nk my hair is half and half,” I tell them. “It’s half Granny and half Grandma!”

  The three of us look at each other. I give them both a smile. “May I have the brush, please?” I ask.

  Grandma hands me the bright blue brush. Granny Coogan smiles at me and nods.

  I part my hair down the middle, ’cause that’s two sections at least. Then I suck in a bunch of air. I scrunch up my face. The first bunch of air goes right out of me so I have to suck in some more air.

  And I start brushing my hair. First, I brush not too hard. I sort of brush the air. But then my brush touches my hair. Just a little at first. Then a little harder. I start brushing at that big ol’ hair knot. Grrr!

  “Take that,” I tell it.

  I brush and brush and brush. And I brush so much, my arm gets worn out. But I make it keep brushing and brushing.

  I brush and brush until my hair flattens like spaghetti almost. I know the hair knot is still hiding there. So I take a deep breath. OW! That brush snags through my hair knot. Some of my hair comes right out! I put that hair on the side of the tub.

  Granny whistles. “Would you look at that?”

  “Oh my,” Grandma says.

  The next time I give that knot a brush, it’s gone!

  I did it!

  I’m never going to skip over the knots EVER again. Maybe.

  17. BEDTIME BUGABOO

  WHEN IT’S TIME FOR BED, I GET a big worry in my head. I know that Granny Coogan makes better pumpkin pie than Grandma. Granny also likes to grow up vegetables, and she lets me stir her chocolate pudding and doesn’t yell when it splatters her new pink blouse.

  But Grandma tells me stories about Brooklyn and Zelda the Zebra. She shows me how outfits go together. She takes me and Jack to Broadway shows and at intermission we overdo it at the snack bar.

  All I do is cause trouble, trouble, trouble for Dad and Mom. Maybe if I moved away, they wouldn’t have to work so hard. Maybe I should just move in with Granny and Grampy. Or Grandma.

  One of my grandmas is plump and cuddly and makes yummy food. One of them wears leopard dresses and sings show tunes.

  But even though Jack’s getting old and doesn’t want to play Blanket of Doom with me, I’d be really, really sad if I only saw him at Thanksgiving.

  I feel a tickle in the back of my throat.

  Then it’s a stingaling tickle. I start crying and carrying on.

  Mom comes rushing in. “Lola, what’s the matter, honey?”

  “I can’t decide!” I cry.

  Jack comes barreling in. “You can’t decide what?”

  “Which grandma I should live with. Granny or Grandma.”

  Mom sits down on the side of my bed.

  “Lola, what makes you think you need to live with either one?”

  There’s a little knock at my door, and then Grandma comes in, and so does Dad and Grampy Coogan and Granny Coogan. My whole room is stuffed full of people.

  “We heard that caterwaulin’,” Grampy says. “What’s up, Peaches?”

  I look at my two grannies and hope that nobody gets fired up. “I don’t know who to go live with. Jack told me that all I do is cause trouble, and I know he’s right but I just can’t help it.”

  “Who did you pick?” both my grannies ask at the exact same time.

  “I can’t decide. I love you both,” I say.

  “Lola,” Mom says. She nestles in close. She smells like pumpkin pie and bath salts. “Do you remember the time I only wanted to eat strawberries?”

  I nod.

  Grampy laughs. “Oh, boy! I sure do.”

  “Well, it probably wasn’t fun for Granny and Grampy to just feed me strawberries.”

  “And remember when I told you about Chuncle getting stuck in the heating vent?” Dad says.

  “I think it was you,” Grandma says.

  “You see, no matter how much trouble we might have caused our parents, they still loved us. Just like Dad and I will always love you. We would never want you to be anywhere but exactly where you are. At home with us.”

  “Even though you’re kind of busy,” I say.

  “That won’t be forever, you know.”

  “I knew that,” Jack says. “’Cause you reminded me already.”

  Mom gives me a big hug. And pretty soon everybody is hugging everybody else.

  “Lola,” Granny says. “I’m real sorry I asked you who you would pick.”

  “Me, too,” Grandma says. “I think you have enough love in your heart for all of us.”

  I grin at my two grandmas and my Grampy Coogan. “I do,” I say.

  “Me, too,” Jack says. “Even though I’m old.”

  18. FRIENDSHIP CIRCLE

  MRS. D. WELCOMES US BACK. Savannah has a bunch of new freckles, Jessie has her hair all braided up, and Sam has a real wishbone. Amanda has a sombrero.

  “Lollipops,” Mrs. D. says, “take out your journals. We’re going to finish what we started in Writers’ Workshop. Please write about what you were thankful for at Thanksgiving.”

  We kids go back to our desks and I take out my watermelon-smelling pencil. My page is still blank from before, but this time, I don’t have to think for a minute. I know what to write.

  This Thanksgiving I was thankful that Mom was able to get the pumpkin pie stains out of her brand new cream-colored trousers that originally cost $40 and that she got on sale for only $14 at Kale’s Department Store because Lord knows it’s hard to find a well-fitting pair of trousers these days. And at a reasonable price.

  I was also thankful that Mrs. McCracken made the best pumpkin pie ever. Now the pie contest is over!

  I’m also thankful that I was at home for Thanksgiving with my whole entire family.

  I’m really, really thankful that I got the hair knot the size of Texas out of my hair.

  Love,

  Lola

  All the kids turn in their journals. We run out for recess. Jessie tells us about getting her hair braided and getting an upset tummy. Savannah tells us about playing Mother May I with all her cousins. I swing on the swings, and Amanda tells me all about the big waves in Cancún.

  Then we four sit in a friendship circle because it’s sunny and golden like toast. I made that friendship circle up. In case you want to try it, you can. You just need friends and stuff to talk about.

  “Maizy slept for a whole day after we picked her up,” Jessie tells me.

  I am peppery about that. “Well, she got lots of exercise.”

  “Barkley loved it on Cherry Tree Lane,” Amanda says.

  “He can come back for a visit anytime,” I say. “As long as I ask Mom and Dad first.”

  The bell rings. Savannah and Jessie run away to line up. But Amanda Anderson and I say, “Ooga booga! Ooga! Booga!” And we give our secret Peanut Butter and Jelly handshake.

  THE KIDS IN MRS. DEBENEDETTI’S SECOND GRADE CLASS (ALPHABETICAL ORDER)

  Amanda Anderson

  Harvey Baxter

  Dilly Chang

  Jessie Chavez

  Abby Frank

  Charlie Henderson

  Sam Noonan

  Sophie Nunez

  Olivia O’Donnell

  Madison Rogers

  Rita Rohan

  Ari Shapiro

  Ruby Snow

  Jamal Stevenson

  Gwendolyn Swanson-Carmichael

  John Carmine Tabanelli

  Timo Toivonen

  Savannah Travers

  Ben Wexler

  Lola Zuckerman

  An Interview with Christine Pakkala

  Q: Lola’s troubles start with a simple hair knot that grows out of control along with the white lies she tells her friends and family. Why does Lola find it so difficult to be honest?

  A: Lola finds it difficult to always tell the truth for lots of reasons, but mainly because she wants her family and friends to be happy. She lies to Amanda about whether or not she asked Mom and Dad if she could watch Barkley during Thanksgiving vacation because she doesn’t w
ant Amanda to worry. She lies to her grandmothers about who makes the best pumpkin pie. She doesn’t want to hurt one grandma’s feelings. She lies to her parents about brushing her hair for a very different reason—she’s afraid it will hurt!

  Q: Lola is sometimes jealous of her friends’ friendships with one another. And she’s also jealous that they’re traveling to exotic places for Thanksgiving, while she’s staying at home. What are some suggestions you would give Lola for ways to handle jealousy?

  A: My dog Maizy is jealous when my other dog, Sugar, gets a good belly rub, even if she just had a turn. Everyone feels jealous at one time or another. In fact, there are probably times when Amanda, Jessie, and Savannah are jealous of Lola! I would ask Lola, when she is feeling jealous, to remember how much her friends and family care about her. I would also ask her to think about all the wonderful things about staying at home for Thanksgiving.

  Q: Truth or Lie is a dinner game that the Zuckerman family plays. Jack refuses to play the game one evening, saying, “I’m a big kid. I have a job to help out the family. And big kids don’t play games.” Mom and Dad are surprised by Jack’s response, but Lola misses out on the family conversation because she’s sent upstairs after an outburst. What might Mom and Dad have told Jack when they talked to him about his jobs and their working so much?

  A: Mom and Dad very well may have told Jack that they appreciate his concern for the family, but that he doesn’t need to worry because Mom and Dad have got everything in control. They might add that this is a difficult time because Mom and Dad do have a lot of work to do, but that won’t always be this busy at the Zuckerman household.

  Q: Mrs. McCracken is cranky because Lola can’t keep Patches from digging in her garden. But even when Mrs. McCracken learns that Lola is caring for two more dogs over Thanksgiving, Mrs. McCracken helps out by giving Lola one of her hats. What makes Mrs. McCracken give Lola her tam-o-shanter?

  A: Sometimes when two people first meet each other, they have a misunderstanding. That just may be the case with Mrs. McCracken and Lola. But when Mrs. McCracken realizes that Lola is feeling a little overwhelmed by all of her dog-watching responsibilities, she seems to treat Lola differently. She also realizes that Lola has a troublesome knot in her hair. Mrs. McCracken was once a girl. Maybe she had knots in her hair, too?